Saturday, July 19, 2014

I'm Supposed to See Results

Yeah, supposed to but NOT! I have been at this healthy new lifestyle of mine for 34 days now. See?

That's 34 days of exercising twice a day, just about every day and counting EVERY.SINGLE.CALORIE I've eaten. And I've lost a grand total of 10 pounds. Not even, it's 9.6. My Fitness Pal rounds up...

I have to say, I'm a bit discouraged. Not really for the 10 pounds. If I could lose 10 pounds in a month, every month, I'd be a happy camper. The problem is that over the last three weeks, I've only lost a total of two pounds. Three weeks of HARD work for two pounds? So each of the last three weeks when I weighed myself (on Saturdays only) I'm seeing the scale nudge under a half pound each time. When you've got a crapton to lose like me, that's some slow ass progress. I keep hoping that one Saturday I'll lose some crazy amount like 3 or 4 pounds to make up for it, but no.  Ready for this? What happened this week? On my flippin' birthday, no less? I GAINED a pound! For serious?!

Is this a test of my patience? my faith? my commitment to a healthy lifestyle? I'm putting in the work - the hard work - for the first time in a long time. I'm not following some fad diet, no pills, or potions. I'm doing it the "right" way for the first time... and I'm not seeing results. That's disheartening.

I gave up my whole summer to devote myself to getting on track. I didn't go to Vegas with all of my teacher friends. I haven't taken a vacation. I haven't even gone away for a day trip with my husband! I really wanted to go back to school with some noticeable results to show for all of my sacrifice, all of my effort, but it's not looking like that's going to happen. Makes me kinda want to cry.

I'm not even seeing those "non-scale victories". My clothes feel about the same. I think I look the same. I do feel a little better. I have more energy and I'm proud of the level of rigorous (for me) exercise I've worked up to - but I NEED real results. Like pounds lost, loose clothes, bubble butt shrinking results. 

Strangely, it's not enough yet to make me give up. This is the longest time that I can remember that I've been consistent with exercise and healthy eating and I'm not quite ready to throw it all away. Oh, I've cried and pouted and thrown a massive hissy fit - but I'm not ready to give up. 

I'm going to keep chugging along. I'm going to up my water intake next week and cut out my beloved Starbucks (even though it's way skinnied down already). I can't say I'll exercise more - I think twice a day is enough. I did make a doctor's appointment to see if maybe, just maybe there's a medical reason this is happening? Maybe I'll step on the scale next week and be rewarded with a big ol' drop and I'll feel elated. Or maybe it will be less than half a pound and I'll cry in my coffee again. Only time will tell...

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